Quotes from Violet Blue

A few days ago Violet Blue wrote a piece for the San Francisco Chronicle titled “Every girl online is fat, ugly and unsexy. Here’s how to get over it.”Perhaps the best part of her editorial was this:

I just write and talk about sex. But every woman on the Internet gets called slutty and ugly and fat (to put it lightly) no matter what; all we have to be is female. In dinner conversation, my friend Lori reminded me of the Oscar Wilde quote, “Give a man a mask, and he’ll tell you the truth.” I restated it for the Internet, replying, “Give a man a mask, and he’ll slit your throat.” The application here is, “Give a man (or a woman) an anonymous account, and he’ll eviscerate your self-esteem.”

The problem is, with so many women I talk to, the trolling is effective. The number of times I’ve talked down a crying girlfriend after she’s been trolled in her comments about being fat, ugly, skanky, slutty or stupid is higher than I can count (no matter what she writes about). Trolls watch too much mainstream porn and TV, and believe stereotypes are real; they slap us with it and then we believe it, too. We compare ourselves to overly thin models, actresses, and porn stars, and it messes with our self-image and our ability to express ourselves sexually, and especially to enjoy sex.
I love the Oscar Wilde quote. For now I’m assuming the quote is correct, I’ll research that later. It’s an apt description of trolls as well as a general description of society. When I decided to make this post I thought I had more to say. I guess what it comes down to is that women are more likely to fall victim to trolls than men since women have already had/are having their self esteem bombarded by society practically as a whole.


~ by ofia on April 1, 2008.

One Response to “Quotes from Violet Blue”

  1. And don’t forget, unlike men (or persons of anonymous internet gender, assumed to be men) women’s opinions are only valid once they’ve been male-approved. Take a look at the block quoted text in this post of Feministe: http://www.feministe.us/blog/archives/2008/04/16/women-dont-speak-up/

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